Welcome everyone another rim rocking edition of the Raw Deal! I’ve been watching a lot of basketball games lately, because the NBA is in full swing! My formula for rooting teams on is very simple: I root for the team that comes from the state with the lower tax evasion rate. Everyone should pay their fair share of taxes, after all! And with that public service announcement, what are you guys looking forward to on Raw?

Well, the biggest deal to me is that Joey Styles debuted as an announcer for Raw during the Taboo Tuesday PPV this past week. He figures to be on this show as well, and that is a major development in my book.

But what about the other two spots? There’s a lot of hunger in the eyes of the rest of the talent roster. Who’s going to step up? Bischoff demanded Carlito get a microphone, and asked him how bad he wanted it. Carlito said there would be no more Cabana, and instead he would concentrate on proving himself as the best wrestler on Raw. Shelton Benjamin got on the mic and asked Carlito if he lost on Taboo Tuesday. (He did.) Benjamin said he deserved one of the spots. Bischoff said he was feeling mighty generous on this evening, and so it would be Benjamin vs. Carlito tonight, and the winner would get a spot on the Raw Survivor Series team. Trevor Murdoch got on the mic and said he and Lance Cade were screwed out of the titles, and he demanded a hardcore match against Kane and Big Show for the titles to prove who the better team was. Bischoff agreed to this. Gregory Helms, the former Hurricane, said that since Bischoff was handing out matches, he wanted one against Rosey, since he was holding him back for so long. Bischoff said this was perfectly fine as well. Mickie James got on the mic and said that everyone should give Trish Stratus a huge round of applause for winning the diva battle royal at Taboo Tuesday. She was, uh, bubbly in doing so. “Alright, yeah. Whatever.” – Eric Bischoff.

Bischoff announced the main event for tonight would be Kurt Angle & Chris Masters vs. Shawn Michaels & John Cena. It was funny how Bischoff kept calling Cena only by his last name, while everyone else got first name-last name treatment. It was like he forgot “John” or something. Bischoff then turned his attention to Edge and Lita, inviting them into the ring with him, and not to be shy. They aired a clip from Taboo Tuesday where Edge was ranting and raving about how he didn’t care about anybody, he didn’t care about Raw, all he cared about was himself. Bischoff played it up big that Edge didn’t care about Raw, and the wrestlers around the ring were all displeased about Edge’s comments. Edge reinforced his early statement, maintaining he doesn’t care about Raw. “What a team player!” – Coach. Bischoff said Edge should care about all the other wrestlers and what they might do to him. Bischoff said they were going to Smackdown, where Edge would compete in a street fight against Batista. He then kicked them both out of his ring and said they would only be welcomed back when they “got the job done.” Bischoff then led everyone in singing the Goodbye song to them.

We came back from break with the match already in progress. I guess you don’t need to do ring introductions for people already in the ring. Benjamin ducked a charging Carlito and sent him spilling over the top rope and to the arena floor. Benjamin, because he is completely insane, then hit a rolling necksnap from the ring apron to the floor on Carlito. Benjamin came back into the ring selling his knee, courtesy of a Carlito dropkick to it. Carlito smelled blood and went to work on the injured knee. Carlito worked him over in the corner and then slapped on a pseudo submission leg hold. Benjamin pulled Carlito’s hair, which Carlito sold like a million bucks. “That was unorthodox!” – Styles. Benjamin caught Carlito charging at him off the ropes and launched him into the air and down to the mat. Benjamin hit some punches and an innovative backbreaker. Benjamin was on 12 different kinds of fire here, hitting stuff like a backdrop. Carlito countered with a shot to the knee, but Benjamin countered a suplex and got a northern lights suplex for a two count. Benjamin took eleventy years climbing the ropes and got caught by Carlito. However, Benjamin punched him down, but then missed something off the top. Carlito hit a DDT, but it only got two. Benjamin hit a Samoan drop out of nowhere, but was too hurt to immediately capitalize. Carlito hit a dropkick to the knee again. Carlito went for a single leg Boston crab, but Shelton rolled through for a pin attempt. Carlito, however, rolled through that and got the pinfall victory while using the ropes.

Backstage, Mickie James was all up in Trish Stratus’ grill. Stratus said they had to talk about what happened at Taboo Tuesday. James said she didn’t have to thank her for her selfless act in helping Trish win the match. What they should be worried about, she said, is their match coming up next. James is so great.

They then cut to footage from last week’s Raw, where Cena had Angle up for the F-U, but Shawn Michaels nailed Cena with the sweet chin music. Just a little reminder to Cena that he wanted his title as much as Angle did. And then, of course, at Taboo Tuesday, it was indeed Angle vs. Michaels vs. Cena. Now, with the main event match teaming Michaels up with Cena, how will they get along? Intrigue!

We came back from break with Styles, Lawler and Coach talking about what went down at Taboo Tuesday. Lawler thanked Batista for taking care of Coach on the show. Then they showed footage from the show. It was an interactive show, you see. The fans had complete control over the voting, and WWE never stooped so far as to tell their fans what they wanted them to vote for. The only reason you can’t consider WWE a stand up company is because companies cannot stand up.

We cut to backstage, where Big Show and Kane were all face-to-face. Show said that he knew neither of them asked to paired up together, but they had to live with each other since they were tag champions. Tonight, they have a hardcore match against Cade and Murdoch, and Show was wondering what Kane’s battle plan was. “Strategy? To elicit as much pain and suffering as possible, to the point where mercy and all human compassion disintegrate into the remains of our lifeless opponents.” Show was touched by this sound strategy. I believe that was the best thing both have done all year.

Before the match, they aired footage from three weeks ago, where Angle beat down Hurricane and then afterwards, Helms slapped Rosey and took off the Hurrimask. The match started with Rosey dominating with power moves and punches and stuff. Helms ran into a couple Rosey clotheslines. Rosey dragged Helms into the middle of the ring and dropped an elbow. Rosey was channeling Iron Mike Sharpe here, being very vocal the entire match. Helms headed for higher ground, but Rosey went out after him and pounded away on him. Rosey rammed him head-first into the ring barrier and the action spilled back inside the ring. Helms countered things by suckering Rosey in and ramming him into the turnbuckles. Rosey got back on the offensive moments later and went up to the ropes, but Helms countered. Helms hit the shining wizard to get the pinfall victory.

Backstage, they showed Cade and Murdoch with a bunch of plunder, in preparation for their upcoming hardcore tag team title match. Styles was marking out about hardcore.

Joey Styles is doing a good job on commentary. He seems genuinely glad to be there, and brings fresh enthusiasm to the broadcast. They should have brought me in for the role, but Styles makes for a decent second option!

Murdoch came to the ring with a red shopping cart full of plunder. This made me very happy. He started things off by tossing a garbage can at Kane, which only served to anger Kane. Show hit his hard slaps on Murdoch in the corner. Cade worked over Kane on the outside, and when Show bounced off the ropes, Cade pulled them down, causing Show to spill to the outside. Kane went up to the top, but got caught with a shot by Murdoch with the trash can lid. The heels teamed up to work over Kane in the ring. Cade lambasted (is that the right use of the word?) Kane with the trash lid, and the heels just generally had things well in hand. As Show tried to make his way back into the ring, Murdoch met with him the garbage can and sent him right back down. Moments later, though, Show made his way back in and helped his team turn the tide. Kane got the kendo stick and swung it like he was Barry Bonds or something, taking out both guys. Show hit a splash on Cade in the corner. Show hit Cade with a back suplex on the trash can. They put the trash can over Murdoch’s head and Kane gave him a big boot. Cade, meanwhile, was crawling towards safer ground, but Kane and Show easily were able to catch up with him and dish out some more punishment. Kane cleared off the announce desk, Show brought Cade over, and they hit a double chokeslam, putting Cade through the table and getting the pinfall victory in that fashion. This was okay for a hardcore match.

Kurt Angle came to the ring to a “You Suck” chorus. Angle got on the mic and said he could not stand that chant. Angle said he would leave the ring and come back, doing his ring introduction over again, and this time he hoped he would get the respect he deserved. He came out again and once again they chanted “You Suck” at him. It was funny, because even after they killed Angle’s music, the fans kept on chanting. He said he trains everyday, he works his ass off every day of the year, for the fans. He said he would give the people one last chance to give him the proper reaction. And if they didn’t, they wouldn’t get the main event. He said he didn’t want to hear “You Suck” again. He came out once again, and yet again the fans chanted that derogatory chant. He called the fans hypocrites for letting their children chant “You Suck” at an Olympic gold medalist. Angle said that if you say you paid for the ticket and that it’s your right to chant stuff at him, he would counter that by saying they were abusing their rights, and they were abusing him! He said he put his body on the line, missing his child’s first words and having his wife leave him, because he dedicated his life to the business. And this was the thanks he got? The cameras panned the crowd as they yelled and jeered at Angle. He said that he doesn’t suck, but rather it’s the fans that suck. He vowed that the main event for the night could go straight to hell. Styles said Angle was incensed.

Backstage, Bischoff was chewing out Angle for what just happened. Bischoff said he had an obligation to be in the main event, as advertised. Angle said he wanted the idiot fans to stop chanting “You Suck.” He also said if he was going to be in the match, he wanted to have a special guest referee. Bischoff said the first request was beyond his control. Angle said if that was the case, he’d just walk out of there. Bischoff said that wouldn’t be necessary, because he’d think of a way to take care of it.

Back to live time, and Triple H was sitting ringside in an easy chair. Triple H was all, “Ooh! This is a guy I don’t particularly care for!” as Flair made his beautiful way to the ring. Flair had Lilian Garcia introduce him as “the man who beat Triple H at Taboo Tuesday.” Nice touch, and Hunter sold it well. Flair’s head was bandaged because, go figure, he bled during the cage match at the PPV. Several fans facing the hard camera had a huge “WOOOOO” sign. Oh yeah, there’s a match going on here. Flair hit a shoulder knockdown, got out of the way of a Conway leapfrog attempt and then chopped him down. Flair was feelin’ it tonight. He woo’d at Hunter a couple times, allowing Conway to get him from behind and hit a hangman’s neckbreaker. Conway then hit a swinging neckbreaker and got a two count for his troubles. Conway slapped at Flair several times and woo’d in his face. Flair grabbed a handful of crotchal region and then chopped him down. Flair hit the knee drop and then went up to the top rope. He actually hit something! This disgusted Hunter. Flair hit a suplex and then went for the figure four. Hunter walked down to the ring with a chain as Conway struggled to get out of the figure four and eventually tapped out.

Immediately after the match, Hunter started choking Flair out with the chain. Flair tried to battle back with some chops. He then punched Hunter over the ring barrier and amongst the crowd. The two brawled all over as security tried to break things up. Styles said this was a preview of what you would see at the Survivor Series. Finally, a bunch of suits and referees managed to separate the two. Flair charged at Hunter one more time, and there was struggle and chaos abounding.

They aired the Smackdown Rebound, which focused pretty much entirely on the Undertaker. Apparently no matches or interviews or angles of any significance happened on Smackdown, if this was all they were going to show on Raw.

They came back from break with footage from earlier in the show, at exactly the right time to show it, with Eric Bischoff blowing out his voice in singing the Goodbye song to Edge and Lita, warning them not to come back until they got the job done on Smackdown. Therefore, this coming Friday night, it will be Edge vs. Batista in a street fight on this week’s Smackdown. They went to backstage, where Bischoff was telling someone in the production truck to do the thing when they heard him say “NOW!” Foreshadowing, you see. Lita came into the scene and tried to slut her way into getting Bischoff to not have Edge do that street fight. She flashed him, which Bischoff responded to by calling her a slut and telling her to put those things away.

Chris Masters came out first for the main event. Styles put over his amazing physique and all. Angle came out and every time the fans would chant “You Suck” it would be censored out with a beep. That is tremendous. The only problem is that there was no way Angle couldn’t hear the chants yet, because the censoring was going on for the television show and not in the arena itself. But what have you. Shawn Michaels and John Cena then came out. Cena got a great crowd reaction. They then announced Angle’s hand-picked special guest referee: Daivari.

We came back from break with action already in progress. This show has a bad habit of doing that to me. Daivari admonished Michaels for a hair pull that didn’t exist and moments later did a lightning quick count on the faces. Coach was great on commentary, defending Daivari’s cheating every step of the way. Cena and Michaels hit a double elbow, but Daivari did a ridiculously slow count on it. Cena hit Masters with a fisherman’s suplex and again Daivari gave a slow count. Cena was increasingly exasperated at the, pardon the expression, Raw Deal he was getting in this encounter. Angle and Michaels tagged in and things got goodly. Daivari stopped Michaels from breaking every rule in the break, because you know he would if given the chance, and this allowed Angle to cold cock him down. Angle then choked Michaels out and Daivari slow counted that as well. Styles had his weekly bird (I never thought I’d be able to use that for anyone other than Michael Cole) talking about the miscarriage of justice that was transpiring. Masters locked in a bearhug. Angle and Masters cut the ring off and worked over Michaels like a good team should. Angle knocked Cena off the apron and went for the Angle Slam, but Michaels countered with a DDT.

Cena finally tagged in and was on all different kinds of clotheslinish fire. He hit the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Angle and then went for the F-U. Masters interfered from behind as Daivari checked to make sure Michaels wasn’t breaking any rules on the ring apron. Masters hit a big time suplex, which Daivari fast counted a two on. Styles complained that he couldn’t even call the counts that fast. Cena hit a desperation suplex on Angle and then made the desert crawl over to his corner. He finally made the Scarlett Johansson tag to Michaels, who worked over Masters with impeccable precision. He clotheslined Angle over the top rope and to the floor. Michaels went up top to hit something on Masters, but Angle slid a chair into Masters. Daivari looked right at the chair, and blatantly turned his back as Masters used it on Michaels. Michaels got hold of the chair in a struggle, Daivari turned around to see him holding it, and then called for the disqualification. It’s just a shame that Michaels, normally a true professional, would stoop so low as to use a chair. After the match, Michaels hit Masters with the sweet chin music, sending him to the outside, and then Angle drove Michaels out of the ring. Cena went for the F-U on Angle, but Angle slid out of the ring and Daivari pasted Cena with the chair. Angle then celebrated his triumph in the ring to the delight of his fans.

I thought this show was okay, but lacking in the workrate department. We all know the kind of standards I set in that department, and it’s shameful to me that wrestling seems to have abandoned that in favor of goofy entertainment type stuff. I’m forced to give the show a 3.5 out of 10.

That was the biggest load of crap you’ve spouted since the last time you said something. I’m speechless, except to say that the show deserves a better grade than that. 5.5 out of 10.

I hate to seem like Mr. Negativity all the time, but… no, I don’t. Hold that thought. I love being negative. It’s in my DNA! This show stunk. 2.5 out of 10.

And I will give the show a 6.0 out of 10. It was pretty good, with Styles on commentary, Angle being fantastic, and Gregory Helms’ theme music providing a beat that you can set your watch to. Goodnight everyone!

6.5. This was a breath of fresh air compared to the past couple weeks’ worth of shows. Having Joey Styles on commentary made a world of difference. It was nice having an announcer that knew the names of some of the moves and wasn’t afraid to call them. In turn, Styles brought Coach and Lawler up a notch as well, as they were allowed to step into roles more comfortable to them. Good announcing can bring a show up a notch, and this show had it. It was also a great night for Kurt Angle. His interview segment, coming back and forth to the ring multiple times in hopes of the fans stopping chants of “You Suck” at him was some of the best stuff on WWE TV all this year. Angle proved his quality in the ring and on the mic here tonight.

Mickie James’ character continues to prove interesting and entertaining. Her Frank Farmer to Trish’s Whitney will be interesting to see play out. Gregory Helms has a new character, and I’ll be further interested to see where they go with him from here on out. His entrance music is tremendous. I’m not the biggest fan of his in ring work, but I’m willing to give this a shot. Thing is, though, there are too many heels right now that look alike and appear to have similar gimmicks. Helms visually looks something like Rob Conway. He’s also a cocky heel, just like Conway. There needs to be plausible differences written into Helms’ new character, so fans can see the difference as something more than just the size of the two guys.

And speaking of Conway, he represents a missed opportunity for WWE that I will delve into further in my Specialists column coming up on Saturday. (Cheap plug.) In the Heart Throbs and Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch, WWE has two heel tag teams that, in theory, could form a solid base to forge a very credible tag team division. Instead, the Heart Throbs have been wasted from the moment they were called up, and tonight was a good first step toward Cade and Murdoch getting the same treatment. Also on the negative side, the Ric Flair vs. Triple H interaction went downhill from the second Hunter left the easy chair. I do expect them to try to make up for it on next week’s show.

Dusty Giebink recommends WWE’s WrestleMania anthology (if you can afford it) for your viewing pleasure. He welcomes any questions, answers, comments or concerns you may have, and can be contacted at dusty13@gmail.com.

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